The Start of Something Special

Welcome to the GUC Blog! Contributors welcome! Let’s get this conversation started!

Every week (and sometimes more), we will share a story or a meditation through our website and we are speaking about mental health this week, as Bell Let's Talk day is Wednesday. We will feature different stories of healing and growth from various contributors. If you would like to share a story, click here. You can share anonymously or openly. Mental health is the number one issue on the list of needs in our community, often being complicated to obtain, leaving many of us high and dry with our unwellness. At Grace, we work as a Hub of Healing, identifying and actioning the challenges our community faces.

As a student, I get asked how classes are going. More often than not, the message screaming from my brain is different than what I say; "oh, it has its challenges, but I am doing alright." In actual fact, it is becoming challenging to keep my head above water, and I almost always feel like I am just about to go under. The mantra of "one step at a time" has changed to "one breath at a time." The stress of COVID and trying to adapt to life as a student has caused my personal anxiety to swell. Unfortunately, all this un-swell stress has magnified my own mental health concerns. Fortunately, this time around the brain-pain-train, I was blessed with incredible support. I am not alone.

First, I talked to God a lot and God said, “here you go, Adrienne!” I started talking about my pain and crippling depression, sharing with a small handful of people I knew I could trust - three, to be exact. By talking to them and through their probing, I could delve deeper into the concerns I had and come up with positive solutions towards understanding what was happening inside me. I decided to reach out to school supports; I spoke to a counsellor and an accessibility advisor. Through them, I was able to undergo a proper psychological evaluation, which is something I have desperately needed for the majority of my life. Over the last month, I have been working to understand my "diagnosis," discerning how this will work into my future.

The last month has been challenging, but the information received has allowed me to learn how to work WITH my disorders and stop fighting AGAINST them. Instead of forcing fixation on my screen for hours, I use a timer and take a five-minute break, every twenty-five minutes, whether I want to or not. This allows me to wiggle and move, get a drink and come back to focus once again. I installed a TRX system to have mini-workouts during my breaks, and I like to draw/doodle or play my uke. I am learning new ways to write papers and finish assignments, such as dictating my compositions as I go for a walk using voice to text on my phone. All this comes down to exploring new ways to be kind to me and finding ways to share the essential parts of my struggle with friends, family, and co-workers. Since I have started explaining why sometimes I seem a little "out there," those closest to me understand why I get confused or overwhelmed, so now they can be more direct with communication or simply appreciate that I am not lazy or careless. I am working on myself, and I feel close to coming out the other side of this darkness.

Were it not for the resources in my school and the care of my faith community, this all would be much more difficult to live with. Mental health help can be hard to find, but we can start with two simple phrases: "Can we talk?" and "I'm listening."

Please, comment and share here, in the section below. We want to create more conversation. If you need help or are in crisis, reach out. It may be a long and frustrating path, but support is available, and we can all work together to get on the healing highway of better mental health.

Pray, listen and love each other, my friends. God is listening and so am I.

With love and light,

Adrienne Christopherson

*The image below has been my break project and day starter for the last week. It has been awesome to doodle, shape and colour my way back into focus.

…and it looks really cool!